Goodbye: A Story of Suicide

by Kevin Wolf

Zuiker Press has published several books in the Teen Topics (“issue-based”) series; and “All of our authors … tell their personal stories [as] … ambassadors of their cause. Their goal … is that young people will learn from their pain and heroics and find HOPE, CHANGE, and HAPPINESS in their own lives. [emphasis in original, page 4]” Other graphic medicine works include Identity: A Story of Transitioning about being transgender and Brother: A Story of Autism—both awaiting review at www.graphicmedicine.org. The covers of the series are similar with the right-side of the protagonists’ face on the cover surrounded by smaller images of events in the author’s life. Each graphic work is illustrated in color and drawn realistically. The book under review from this series (Goodbye: A Story of Suicide) is about the tragedy of a thirteen-year-old killing herself because of school bullying without the school informing her parents of the bullying; and their daughter keeping this information and her struggles from her parents as well.

Trigger warning: the book reviewed here is about suicide. The new suicide lifeline number is 988. It’s hard for me to write a negative review of a book that covers such a serious subject. Though written from Hailee’s perspective, this work seems more concerned about the impact of Hailee’s suicide on her family and not on Hailee herself. Whereas if it had been written from her parents’ view, the family’s concerns would make more sense. I appreciate that her parents want to tell their daughter’s story to prevent other children from being bullied or killing themselves (i.e., to not choose “…a permanent solution for a temporary problem [7]).” I have two difficulties with this story, the narrator is an afterlife-Hailee, who now knows more than she could’ve likely known in her lifetime, and the story is so brief that I have trouble empathizing with Hailee’s torment. There’s no mention of contemporaneous sources from Hailee (such as from a diary or words she shared with friends, family or teachers), except her brief posthumously-found suicide note. Hailee narrates “In my suicide note, I asked that my parents tell the school what those bullies did to me [71]” with no additional information about the note’s contents provided. The back cover of Goodbye: A Story of Suicide states, “Hailee’s parents have decided to tell Hailee’s story as if she were telling it. In so doing, they hope to reach other young people in crises, to show them that they do have options. And to prevent them from bringing the excruciating pain of suicide to their families.” This also fulfills the Zuiker Press policy for their authors to “… tell their personal stories … [4]” I believe the story would’ve been more powerful if it had been written from the perspective of its actual source: Hailee’s parents. Hailee’s suicide led to this book, the 2015 Nevada Hailee’s Law[i], and a successful lawsuit settlement against the Clark County School District in Nevada by Hailee’s parents.

All indications are that her parents were unaware of Hailee being bullied at school. For example, Hailee didn’t want to attend early morning math class—where she excelled—and was now being bullied by a boy (C.H.). C.H. bullied Hailee because of his unrequited crush on her. Instead of telling the truth, Hailee tells her mom she’s overextended with “… a full load. And soccer … [42]” but not about the bullying. Goodbye has Hailee narrate, “It was the first time I ever lied to my mother. [42]” Furthermore, Goodbye includes a very troubled homelife for C.H. (alcoholic father who abandoned the family, and “mother never recovered [40]” which I would think Hailee would have had no idea about. These details provide more humanity to C.H. (and later to another bully J.J.), than only being a spurned bully.

A second bully, J.J., but this time in physical education class, gets the same treatment: Hailee showing J.J. being beat up outside of school—unlikely known to Hailee—and in turn beating up Hailee. Goodbye indicates only one substitute teacher noticed the bullying and wrote a note (“J.J. is bullying Hailee again. You might want to make note of it. [45])” to Hailee’s teacher but that revelation went no further with Hailee’s parents unaware. Why is Hailee singled out? Hailee excelled in her classes, especially math, and was a very talented soccer goalie. We see a cabinet and wall in her home being filled with awards, ribbons, and certificates of achievement. In fifth grade Hailee narrates, “I was the only person in the state to get one hundred percent on the proficiency test. One hundred percent, as in one double zero.” Hailee narrates, “[J.J.] didn’t like me because I wore glasses and I was a straight A student.”

Goodbye picks out events that allegedly tormented Hailee—but I have trouble with not knowing how true they are. For example, Hailee allegedly didn’t care about a note from C.H. with the words “Pig! Ugly! Fatso! Dummy!” but another note from C.H: “’No boy is ever going to love you!’ … began to punch my ticket … [41].” Later we see Hailee crying with tears dripping from her face while she does the dishes at home with her mom and brother in the background but not noticing Hailee’s misery. So, who would know that that event happened? A Ferris wheel is used as a joyful event when she’s on it with her younger brother; but otherwise, it becomes her symbol of only-her-death ending the cycle of bullying. Is this Ferris wheel Hailee’s symbol or her parents’ symbol of the loss of their daughter. Her suicide appears to have happened at her home [57] and not connected to the Ferris wheel.

The book closes with a few resources, pictures of Hailee with her family, and some helpful information from Lorran Garrison, a school psychologist, who provides “Five Parent Take-aways about Suicide (with prevention tools):”

1. If your child appears self-destructive, take it seriously. [Hailee had been cutting herself; presumed unknown until after her death, because there is no indication from others.]
2. Get help! (Provides the old Suicide Prevention Lifeline when the book came out in 2020; new number is 988; and seek help at the school or from community mental health resources)
3. Warning signs (such as, direct or indirect threats to kill oneself, giving away prized possessions, changing behavior or appearance, among others)
4. Ask your child, ‘Are you thinking of suicide?’ (Don’t judge. Provide constant supervision and remove things that might cause self-harm, among other activities)
5. After the immediate crisis is over, keep communication open.

Goodbye has Hailee’s options to suicide provided in a single panel “…that honestly, I never knew I had … [being] “Changed schools … changed cities … changed mindsets …” (71) without further explanation. To start or continue the conversation about suicide, perhaps parents with their children could use Goodbye in consultation with a mental health counselor.

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[i] From KSNV News3LV:  Hailee’s Law is “…if [school] administrators or teachers fail to notify parents or willfully don’t report [bullying] incidents they see [‘…within 24 hours and complete an investigation within three days’], it could mean suspension, dismissal or a revocation of a license.”)