The Book of Niall

The Book of Niall merges dream life, acting, magical thinking and diagnosis (not to mention exquisite artwork) to create a mesmerising work well worth reading.

The main character, Niall Adams, is an actor, known for his part as a superhero in a series entitled “Logos:  First Order”. He is a handsome man with an Irish name, a British accent and an American character role. His recently completed movie series is poorly reviewed, and his womanizing, superficial agent manages to get him nominated for a Best Actor award, with the express aim of distracting public attention from the negative reviews.  But, while his agent is trying to protect his career, his love interest is trying to launch her own (she’s a model and actor). Niall feels like his life is falling apart.

Niall watches himself going through the actions of living as if he were an actor in his own life.  We see a shadow talking to him, and as readers need to—as does Niall—piece together what is real, and what is meta-analysis of the play of life.  Seeing oneself from the outside in, as does Niall, in The Book of Niall, is a feature of depersonalisation-derealisation disorder.

Depersonalisation-derealisation disorder is one of the dissociative disorders described in DSM-5.  These are conditions in which the individual finds their normal consciousness interrupted, and in this case, finds their life to be unreal, and experienced as detachment from their self or their body.  Like Niall, they can become observers of their speech and actions, rather than active agents in their life stories.

At the same time, Niall IS an actor.  He plays a superhero in a movie franchise.  In disassociation, he sees himself as an actor, but an actor who acts as an actor.  It becomes like repeating mirrors.  The way in which the Niall’s profession weaves in between his experience of life as a staged experience is complex, enthralling and captures the intricacy of his condition.

Figure 1 Niall sees himself as actor, acting as an actor, like repeating mirrors.

This very clever book not only describes Niall’s disassociation, it also invites the reader to disassociate from their own stance as observer, becoming instead an active agent in the book.  They can read the black captions or the white ones.  It’s a kind of “create your own adventure book.”  However, the reader can’t escape their own stance as observer any more than Niall can; they are imprisoned in a journey and an ending, like Niall imagines himself to be.  Of course, they can go back and re-read a different set of captions; Niall can’t.

Beautifully drawn, alternating between barely-colour-washed ink, sepia line drawings, and vivid colour panels (these, most frequently associated with popular culture and a “reality” the reader can imagine), we accompany Niall in and out of his rocky relationship with himself, his female companion and his disassociation.  In addition to the visual weaving in and out, The Book of Niall splices in a thread of magic, with a magician leading Niall through a world of illusion. That the author IS a magician, who himself experiences depersonalisation disorder, adds a layer of intrigue as the reader (like Niall), and particularly if they read the back cover, continues to wonder what is real, what is fiction, and what is beyond their ken.

The Book of Niall uses depersonalisation disorder powerfully as a technique to create a captivating, complex and rewarding narrative.  While the author has cast this book as awareness-raising, and therapeutic, it is also, and perhaps above all, a brilliant and beautiful story.

Prof Annemarie Jutel

Te Herenga Waka, Victoria University of Wellington (NZ)

About the reviewer:  Annemarie Jutel is a sociologist of diagnosis and author of the books “Putting a Name to it:  Diagnosis in Contemporary Society (JHUP)”  and  “Diagnosis: Truths and Tales (TUP)”